headandhand: (Default)
the head | the hand ([personal profile] headandhand) wrote in [community profile] dualisooc2019-05-26 06:08 pm
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TDM 001. WELCOME TO THE CITY

» 01. WELCOME WAGON

Wow, what a bunch of new faces! The city of Dualis hasn't seen anything like this in a long time, and they've seen some pretty crazy things. Chances are you're seeing some pretty crazy things, too, unless you're used to a lot of neon, robots, weird-ass technology, magic, and an omnipresent police force...and hey, if you are, congrats, you're gonna settle in juuuuust fine. But for the rest of you, the Head knows this has gotta be pretty overwhelming, right?

Well, since your quaint individual processing units are probably having a hard time, why not link up with another one? By which the Head means...

Hello, new citizens of Dualis, and welcome to your first monthly Network Adjacency Protocol~!

NAPs are a monthly community networking event similar to the Earth concept of speed dating! Two citizens (new arrivals and old hands alike) are placed at a table together with a handy cue card of queries to help break the proverbial ice. Ask queries and receive results, or ignore the card and yeet yourself straight into a brand new friendship! But don't be too shy, you've only got ten minutes together, and if you just sit in silence for the whole ten, then the Network Admins are likely to come supervise and try to repair the uplink through a mild shock to the ol' central nervous system. You might find yourself saying all sorts of unintended facts about yourself if that happens...probably better to just make friends, right?

» 02. A BUG IN THE CODE

Remember how the Head mentioned that whole plague thing? Well, don't worry, this isn't that.

It is, however, a really, really terrible flu circulating through the residents of Dualis. Symptoms include fever, chills, vomiting, hallucinations and even in some cases seizures. Bad news, all around. Luckily, this is something the Head knows how to deal with! Time for vaccinations, everyone~

The vaccination process is pretty straightforward: just head to your local clinic and get innoculated! You'll be in and out in less than ten minutes, MedDualis is pretty efficient that way. There isn't even a copay. The MedDroids will tell you, however, that there might be some minor side effects** to watch out for, including physical reactions and odd dreams, but don't worry--those will wear off within forty-eight hours. Nothing to concern yourself about! Of course, if that worries you, you could always run the risk of getting the flu--or passing it on to your loved ones...

**Possible side effects include: Gender or sex change, positive or negative size change, appearance alterations, shared dreams, and mild telepathic links, among others. Please contact your local MedDroid if these symptoms become too severe, or other side effects such as death occur.

» 03. TANSTAAFL

Well, you're settling in just fine, and the basic accommodations and amenities are okay, but maybe you've got a hankering to see that new VR Film: SHARKS IN SPACE 85: BLACK HOLE SHARK DO DO DO DO DO DO DO. Or maybe you want some sweet new duds to wear around town, or even just an actual slab of steak. Sorry, those cost extra, pal, which means it's time for...

JOB HUNTING.

Fortunately, Dualis makes this pretty easy! There's a job fair on this week, down at the Central Hub! Plug your certifications and skills into any of the EmployMe terminals in the Dualis Central Hub, and the computer will auto-generate a currently open job that it feels you'd be best suited for. No resume writing or lengthy application process required! Of course, whether or not this job sounds like the right job for you is another matter...but hey, how could an AI with millions of years of learning be wrong? Time to get started, or try and switch waivers with another unhappy new employee--but be warned, some unforeseen consequences may occur if you try swapping identities with someone else...
punchpunchkisskiss: (thinking)

01!

[personal profile] punchpunchkisskiss 2019-09-25 08:54 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Finn is trying his hardest to follow this conversation. He's been friends with Princess Bubblegum for ages, it's not like he's totally incompetent in a science talk. Still, his perspective here is so far removed from cereal. ]

But... if something like that happened, couldn't you just like, engineer a cure? I mean, that's how they were made in the first place, isn't it?
holyfuckbatman: (shithouse10)

[personal profile] holyfuckbatman 2019-09-25 09:39 pm (UTC)(link)
[Dick isn't actually an expert on banana science. He picked it up at some point and retained it and he's not sure if right now he's glad or if he regrets it. He can recognize that maybe this conversation isn't going as well as it could be.]

I mean, I guess they'd have to. But it wouldn't solve the problem, just delay it.
punchpunchkisskiss: (talk)

[personal profile] punchpunchkisskiss 2019-09-25 09:53 pm (UTC)(link)
That's okay though, as long as they're feeling better, right? I mean, nobody lives forever.
holyfuckbatman: (shithouse10)

[personal profile] holyfuckbatman 2019-09-26 11:31 am (UTC)(link)
[Now Dick is confused.] ....are we still talking about bananas?
punchpunchkisskiss: (true neutral)

[personal profile] punchpunchkisskiss 2019-09-26 11:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, yeah.

[ That's the one part of this conversation he was confident in. ]

Banana Guards, right? 'Cause they were all made in PB's lab.
holyfuckbatman: (shithouse11)

[personal profile] holyfuckbatman 2019-09-27 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Banana... guards? [Dick just looks blank.] I just meant the fruit.
punchpunchkisskiss: (thinking)

[personal profile] punchpunchkisskiss 2019-09-28 08:59 pm (UTC)(link)
The ones that guard the Candy Kingdom, yeah.

[ Now he's confused. ]

I thought bananas for eating grew out of the ground.

[ Some things they really don't teach you in school... Especially if you never attend one. ]