dualisooc | TDM 002. WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE.

» 01. I LIKE TO PARTY AND BY PARTY I MEAN NAPS.

Look at all of these bright, shining new faces! There’s even a few less bright, less shining faces, but hey, this city welcomes all types. Chances are, if you’ve just arrived, you're seeing some pretty crazy things, unless you're used to an eye-blinding amount of neon, robots, weird-ass technology, magic, and an omnipresent police force...and hey, if you are, congrats, you're gonna settle in juuuuust fine. But for the rest of you, the Head knows this has gotta be pretty overwhelming, right?

Well, since your quaint individual processing units are probably having a hard time, why not link up with another one? By which the Head means...

Hello, new citizens of Dualis,
and welcome to your monthly Network Adjacency Protocol~!

NAPs are a monthly community networking event similar to the Earth concept of speed dating! Two citizens (new arrivals and old hands alike) are placed at a table together with a handy cue card of queries to help break the proverbial ice. Ask queries and receive results, or ignore the card and yeet yourself straight into a brand new friendship! But don't be too shy, you've only got ten minutes together, and if you just sit in silence for the whole ten, the Network Admins are likely to come supervise and try to repair the uplink through a mild shock to the ol' central nervous system. You might find yourself saying all sorts of unintended facts about yourself if that happens...probably better to just make friends, right? Who doesn’t like friends?!

This month’s event is held at the brand new RoCocoa Cat Cafe, a sparkly new establishment that caters to children and the young at heart with iced and hot cocoa drinks of all kinds, delicious pastries, age-appropriate live music, and of course many friendly kitties who love to lounge in laps. The cats are of all shapes, sizes, and colors, including some who may look a little different from what you expect, or may look like an ordinary cat but are actually anything but ordinary underneath that adorable fur coat. All cats in the cafe are adoptable, of course, for those who meet a new furry friend and just can’t bear to go home without them!

So pull up a chair, get to know your new neighbors, and enjoy a sugary treat or two with the resident furbabies. You might just meet your new two- or four-legged best friend!

» 02. TO TAG OR NOT TO TAG, THAT IS THE QUESTION.

Welcome, one and all, to a long-running time-honored Dualis tradition: the annual city-wide Dualis Marker Tag Competition! For this entire month, all participants who accept the challenge will be given a marker and set free to tag any other participant in the city by making a mark on their skin, while attempting to avoid being tagged themselves. Careful, though - the ink marks last a very long time, so you’ll have to wait until the competition concludes to wash everything off.

Markers come in all colors, even fluorescent, glitter, and glow-in-the-dark, and you can use however many markers your inner child’s heart desires. These markers will leave marks even on people who have chosen not to play, but you can easily purchase an armband, headband, or similar accessory that says NONPARTICIPANT if you so desire. Marking nonparticipants is considered extremely bad form and wins you no prizes, but "misfires" do still happen sometimes. It’s usually considered polite to offer a mistaken nonparticipant that you’ve marked a small reparation, like coffee or a more adult beverage.

Safe zones do exist! Any establishment can put out a sign that marks it as such - signs in shop windows, chalkboards outside bars, and the like; many do this, just to keep the general chaos and injury/property damage liability down. Tenants of private residences typically agree that their spaces are also safe zones, but that's up to y’all to hash out.

Have fun! And maybe try not to put anyone’s eye out, yeah?

» 03. TRICK OR TREAT, TRICK OR TREAT, THE BITTER AND THE SWEET ...

Looks like the Head’s been clued in to the quaint alien custom known as trick-or-treating. Is today Halloween? Who cares! You get free candy! Free candy for you, free candy for you, everybody gets free candy!

And rather than make citizens work for that free candy by traipsing around in costumes, the Head’s decided to cut everyone a little break and just have bowls of wrapped sugary delights placed strategically throughout the city. You never know where you’ll find them, or what types of candies the bowls will contain - chocolates, of course, and jellybeans and hard candies of every flavor you can think of, and treats you’ve probably never seen before now. Ooh, is that a snoobloo-flavored truffle? Only one way to find out! Eat it.

The treats are not poisoned or otherwise dangerous, but some do have a trick up their wrappers. Candies may cause temporary side effects: minor appearance changes, enhancing or reducing senses, sudden mild development of extranormal abilities, or loss of control over abilities you already possess. Some sweets are just regular treats and produce no effect except maybe cavities, if you don’t brush your teeth. Effects will remain until another candy is consumed that either induces a different effect or nulls the current effect and simply tastes nice. Enjoy!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Noted, I'll try not to stay up too late and party.

Oh no, they probably wouldn't stop you from that. They might even know the clubs worth going to, the ones that don't have the cops around much.

It was a hint, boy genius, change the subject.

[Boy genius. More accurate than she can believe.]

How about them Cubs?

[Traditional subject change. Hopefully it gets a chuckle.]

Ha ha. Wouldn't know, unless they're the ones pulling all the strings. Been a little busy lately to keep up with sports.

I only ever keep up with Hockey, so I guess I get that.

[He wants to know what she was doing. He also doesn't intend to pry.]

You know, you can tell me to go away. I won't be offended.

Aw, when we're having such an interesting conversation? And I just got done telling you how sweet I am?

Sweetest sister I've met here. Which is definitely the highlight of my day. But if you're not shooing me off and you'll willing to deal with the off-duty male nurse ready to jump in just in case evil candy tries to kill people, maybe I can tell you about the place near here where they have a throwing axe restaurant and bar.

[Wait they have a what now?]

Continue.

[Yep. Someone who runs with Deadpool would probably enjoy that place.]

It's a bar and grill, really good food, and I'm saying that as a guy with a chef background as well. And you can just throw axes at targets. It's like going to an arcade or a shooting range, but you can eat there too. But they do have a drink limit if you're going to throw things.

Shit, you do everything, don't you?

[Now the question is how long could she get away with taking bets before everybody figured it out...]

[Make all the bets. Take all the money.]

My name, as a mutant, was Prodigy. My power let me copy the knowledge and skills of people around me. A portion of which I remember while I'm here. So yeah, a bit of everything. Not all of it useful.

That's cool. Could have used that before.

Before?

[What exactly could he have been useful for? He can hardly think of anything.]

Don't suppose you're going to enlighten me as to your meaning?

Nope. Top secret. Lots of things exploded.

Completely fair. Hopefully no one worth knowing got exploded.

[Racists and assholes, not worth knowing, for the record.]

Only the people who really deserved it did.

[Their definitions of deserved may be different, but he's not going to really comment on that point.]

Well, this axe-throwing place might amuse you. If you're able to live with the staff hovering nearby. Liability things.

Maybe we'll get lucky.

We'll?

[Now now, Domino, use new words. And more of them. Because if you do, he'll pay for a round of axes just to get shown up.]

Oops?

Hardly. I expect you said exactly what you want. I can buy you a round.

Aw, how sweet.

And here I thought you were the sweet one. I'm just the guy that ends up patching people up over there.

We'll just hope no one loses a finger.

(no subject)

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